Is it really all worth it?

It has been a long time since I have blogged.

Why is that?

Well life has been busy, especially preparing for my son’s confirmation, which was last Sunday. But now that’s all over, I can get back to business. I keep having blogs written in my head but not always having the time and sometimes not the energy to actually sit down and write it!

Anyway, enough about that..this blog is because needing to get some things off my chest. A few frustrations I guess. I did start this blog as a way to be able to share all the good and this is one of the down/negative days.

Yesterday, I came across this article/blog on one of my friend’s Facebook pages:

Now before I go on, I think it would be wise for you to read the blog first so you understand where I am coming from….

Since I began this journey…well, it may seem like it was only a few short weeks ago, but this is really something that I have been striving to do all my life. But I was always ruled and believed what the media/advertising companies were selling to me and ended up with low-fat products, or  diet products which at the time, I really believed was the best thing for me. Now when you do some research and the way that things are advertised, this is no longer the way to go!

I knew that there had to be a better way and a few years ago, attempted to implement this more in our lives by buying more organic fruits and vegetables but what I was still remaining ignorant about, is the amount of packaged and boxed products that I was still filling my pantry with. And I will admit, it did make my life easier to buy these products, especially when I was working full time. Since I’ve had my daughter 21 months ago, my whole outlook on health changed. I am not saying that it’s not something that has always been around, cause clearly it has and I did witness many people in my family and friends taking the road of sacrifice with their health choices. Basically, I just wanted the easier way and hoped that the choices that I was making was enough to keep us healthy.

As I mentioned, after having my daughter…things changed so much in me. I don’t know if it was having a girl that maybe awakened more of my feminine spirit and drive. Just even the sacrifices that I made to lose the immense amount of weight was massive. Since then, I have felt such power and courage inside of me. Like finding a part of myself that was buried and is now alive again. I am not saying that I didn’t know that a lot of the things that I was eating or drinking were not good for me…I simply didn’t want to apply the better options or choices. I knew Coke was not good for me, yet I still chose to drink it because it kept me somewhat alive and awake, the same with caffeine, chocolate, cakes, etc…

One of the main things that I realised in the last few weeks was that I had a massive addiction to chewing gum. The reason I chose to chew gum was to stop me from eating food and also keep my breath fresh. Again, I knew the damage aspartame could have on me and how it has affected other people who have excessively consumed it. I guess, looking back on it now, I was being ignorant without knowing it and clearly making the choice to be caught up in the matrix(basically being controlled by the likes of the media/advertisers/politics). It felt good to me at the time and wanted to prolong it as much as possible. Much like many things that I still make these kind of choices with at this point in time, I guess in time, it will be as clear as what this is  and the lesson will be learnt. Looking back now, I see where the migraines/headaches stemmed from that I have suffered from for 2 years and ended up on very strong pain medication for – which I absolutely hated and ended up stopping myself when I was going through crazy side effects from the tablets – mainly nightmares and feeling like I was not in this world!

Where am I going with this? Not sure if it’s making any sense to be honest, I am just typing as things come to mind as I feel I have so much to say and my mind is very cluttered at the moment.

Back to the present moment, as to the reason why I am making  reference to this blog/article above. After reading this, I felt quite depressed and discouraged. I have adapted many changes in our health lifestyle that my family have been so amazing and completely embraced because they know that I am only wanting the very best for us all. Pantry food items have been cut down by at least 90%. The things that I still do buy, I read labels or buy organic wherever possible as well as ensure that they are preservative free. Sometimes it’s not complete avoidable but I do my best – even when I am planning to have people over, I make the choices that I would make for us, for them too – but still allowing some of their choices because I really can’t control what their choices are.

For example, yesterday’s market day saw me with a small amount of funds to spend as there was a bit of overspending for the confirmation on Sunday. Out of $105, I spent $34 on fruits & vegies, $28 on poultry products  and $38 @ Aldi(and $14 of that was on nappies)….So I thought I did quite well. Considering the ratio of fresh products being greater than that of pantry items(which includes milk). I was talking to my husband about it last night and I am realising it now as I am writing this that I am doing enough FOR NOW…it’s only the beginning. I know that we still have a long way to go, this is only the beginning of the journey. And there will always be circumstances like this to make me doubt what I am doing and feel like just going back to the old ways. But it’s like I was saying to hubby last night…perseverance and consistency is what is needed right now with the changes that we are implementing and slowly, as those changes are more concrete and complete habit, other things that can still be changed can start to be implemented to. Otherwise, it’s way too overwhelming.

After reading that article, I wanted to just crawl up in a corner and hide. but this morning I realised that the article came before my eyes for a reason. To show me that there are still choices that I need to make an implement and I know that after reading that article, the choices I make will be more informative and with caution. It really does make me angry that I can’t trust everything that I read…after putting into practice of reading all labels before I buy. Even the word organic is over used these days. If there is only one ingredient that is organic, then it is  sold as an organic product!! It’s crazy and so frustrating. I have also come to the conclusion that I need to look more into the products that I buy, by researching the companies that sell organic products and their authenticity. Which will take time… I know that I still have a long way to go, but I will get there and I have decided that this is worth it. Not only for my own health and my family’s but mostly for my freedom and for the example that I am being for my children and the legacy that I am passing on by telling them the truth!

Thanks for reading my ramblings! :) It was through writing this, whilst my daughter was having a nice long nap today, that I was able to see things more clearly and be more determined. A lot like meditation and listening to my inner voice and not allowing my ego to beat me down. Thank you again and maybe this will be helpful to someone who comes across it today or someday :))))

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30 Day Fat Loss Challenge(DFLC)

On Monday 28th of May,I began Day 1 of carmengetfit 30 Day Fat Loss Challenge.  As I have mentioned in previous posts, Carmen is my Zumba teacher, but she is also a personal trainer.

Basically, it is a calorie healthy eating plan with Tabata exercises.

Now you may be wondering, since I have just been on a 28 day cleansing/detox, Why have I decided to do this?

Well, after the whole detox/fast experience, I feel like I need something else to help me with the last 7-8kgs that I want to exchange. The fast gave my body the boost that it needed to move 5kgs as well as led me on the path of a healthier lifestyle.

I am finding on this particular journey though that I do have this obsession with the numbers on the scale(much like I did when I was on Weight Watchers also). As much as I do my best to not allow it to be an obsession – the truth is that it is! It’s my confirmation that I am on the right track. At times, I find myself weighing in everyday. It helps me to stay on track and have something to aim for that day. I know that “THEY” say that you shouldn’t do it, but when I am having to rely on stats for my food and exercise, the numbers on the scale do matter to me.

When I was on the detox, it wasn’t as much of an issue…I could clearly feel the difference and didn’t need the scale to tell me that I was different…yet I still weighed myself every 3 days or so…force of habit I suppose. It annoys me that I rely on the scale so much. But I have decided, once I am done with this challenge, which is only in 19 days, my challenge will be to stay away from the scale ..beginning with a 21 day challenge.

The first week went quite well. As with most eating plans, you must have a plan, shop before hand and make sure you stick to what is on the menu or make up something close to healthy! I downloaded My Fitness Pal on my phone to keep record of my foods and exercise. I love this app! It’s so easy to drive! According to the app, I can have 1418 calories per day.  Most of the first week, I stuck to salads and smoothies. Told my family that I will be cutting rice out of our diet for at least the next four weeks at dinner time and they were all quite happy to comply …thankfully! I never really had any bad days. Everything that I had was accounted for, even the 2 glasses of red wine(consciously made this choice as lower in calories)  on Friday night and the 2 on Saturday night.

Carmen did weigh me and measure me at Zumba on Tuesday night – which to be frank, when she told me, I was dreading.

For one, I knew I would be heavier because I had just eaten before going to class and also because I retain a lot of fluid during workouts, so this would reflect on the scale. Then I was also dreading how much of a difference the scale at home will be compared to hers! Anyway, in the end, it showed that my scale is 1kg under. So I have been thinking I am closer to my goal, but I really was a little further away. I know, it’s only 1kg(900g to be exact) – but I did let it get me down that night. Rolled in self pity for the night and the next day, woke and took action to change it. Basically by sticking to plan and stepping up my workouts! Mostly, ensuring that I work out 6 days in the week(Sunday being my free day)

By weigh in day on Monday 4th of June, the scale showed 1kg exchanged.

I was actually quite happy with that. To be honest, I wasn’t sure that I would budge much after exchanging so much during the detox/cleanse. So for me, this was a bonus!

Meanwhile, this week hasn’t been as promising as last week. Yes, sure – I am still making good choices, but I have also made less than favorable choices too. And unfortunately, I know it’s not an excuse, but it’s the fact – my time of the month is just around the corner and everything is looking delicious. What I have been able to do is channel those cravings mostly in to making mostly new healthy recipes! I have been very busy investigating other choices for what we can eat at night, instead of rice. Some of those choices pictured below.

With workouts, I have been quite good. I can’t complain on that front. I made up for some Zucchini & carrot cake that I had made and scoffed down today, making up for it at a 90mins Zumba session. It was awesome. Loved it!

Week one Workouts consisted of the following:

  • Jillian Michael’s ripped in 30 – Week 3 + yoga = 50mins
  • Zumba with Carmen = 60mins
  • Jeanette Jenkins 21 day total body circuit = 38mins
  • Jillian Michael’s kickbox fast fit = 60mins + yoga
  • Billy Blanks Bootcamp #1 = 38mins
  • Jillian Michael’s Extreme shed & shred = 35mins

Week two Workouts consisted of the following:

  • Jillian Michael’s ripped in 30 – Week 3 + yoga = 50mins
  • No workout(was feeling unwell on this day)
  • Jeanette Jenkins 21 day total body circuit = 60mins
  • Yoga meltdown with Jillian = 35mins + Zumba with Carmen = 90mins
  • Jillian Michael’s kettle bells  = 30mins OR Ministry of sound dance workout = 75mins
  • Jillian Michael’s Extreme shed & shred = 55mins

I can definitely feel the definition coming up in my body with all this consistency with my workouts. This is what I am aiming for in this challenge – toning is the most important part and of course, still eating what I have been implementing. But I have to admit that I have had a few slip ups in the last week or so – but been making sure to make up for it in my workouts and making different choices the next time. I have been finding that not eating was so much easier for me or when I had just the lemon detox drink to have! But I know that these aren’t long term plans!

This post has taken 2 weeks for me to write up so I am going to post this up now before going to bed!!!

Thanks for allowing me to rant :)))

These are what were a hit for dinner in the last 2 weeks(oh and one for breakfast!):

Potato gratin with minced meat made Monday night
Not one of my finest moments…although the recipe had many good ingredients in it…
I overindulged in my portion on that day for sure!!
Yellow Quinoa with Chicken & herbs sausages
(alternate to rice)

Overnight, Slow Cooker, Apple Cinnamon Oatmeal
Made last night and woke up to this for breakfast this morning…sooo delish!!!

Bacon & Vegetable Fritata with Salad
Couscous with prawns

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